Sunday, October 15, 2006

Raising Girls That Pimps and Thugs will Hate...

Doug Giles... Part I:
1. Teach Them How to Fight.
2. Teach Them How to Shoot Guns.
3. Teach Them How Sense BS.
4. Teach Them How to Rebel.
5. Teach Them How to Be Classy (That’s mostly my wife’s job.)
6. Teach Them to Despise Anti-Intellectualism.
7. Teach Them to Be Visionaries.
8. Teach Them How to Party.
9. Teach Them the Value of Hard Work.
10. Teach Them the Importance of Traditional Convictions
Part II:
2. Teach Them How to Shoot Guns. With demoniacs now boldly going into Amish Schools and shooting innocent little girls, and with insane, should-be-dead-and-roasting-in-hell perverts and pedophiles prowling our parks and picking on our chicks, I’m a zealous advocate for women getting packed, stacked and ready to whack.

Fathers, I wouldn’t have your girl learn how to just barely use a weapon; I would be aiming for her to be able to emulate Angelina Jolie’s character in Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Yeah, I would teach her to be proficient in all forms of death dealing with all types of guns.

My advice to you fathers when it comes to guns is: start them off early (10 years old) and slow. With a proper introduction, I’ve never met a girl who (once she got past an initial squeamishness) didn’t absolutely positively love shooting guns.

A mild .38 Special revolver, or a .380 automatic pistol plus a .22 rifle and a nice 20-gauge shotgun that fits her well (very important), is a good way to get the party started. A year of you and her regularly hammering targets down range should set her up to be a girl no one wants to get PO’ed.

Finally, make sure she gets a “concealed weapons” permit as soon as she can. Remember Dad, the toe tag belongs on the assailant, not your young lady. The final 8 nuggets next week. . . .

Part III:
9. Teach Them the Value of Hard Work. Tell your daughter and show her by example that the harder she works, the luckier she’ll get. Make sure she doesn’t have an entitlement mentality towards you, a sugar daddy, church or our government.

10. Teach Them the Importance of Traditional Convictions. You do not have to be a tongue talkin’, “on fire,” Pentecostal father to teach your little girl the importance of faith in God, how to pray and the value of biblical values. This often ridiculed biblical infrastructure just happens to be a major part of why the west is the best. And dad, don’t pass spiritual training off to your wife. She’s only part of your girl’s spiritual picture.
My friends with all girls have it made... for the moment anyway. I keep telling myself - with 3 boys - that it's tougher now, but that boys will be easier as teenagers. I'm counting on it!

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